This article has been submitted by Kritika Vidyarthi for the CLATGyan Blog Post Writing Competition. If you think this article is a good read, ‘Like’ this article on Facebook (the button is at the bottom of this piece) or post a comment using the ‘comments’ section below.
Picture this: You’re hanging by ropes, tightly held; a hundred feet above the ground. You’ve been that way for a while now. Only, the ropes aren’t holding you – you’re holding them. You’ve been avoiding your problems for a long time and these ropes are the excuses that you’ve been holding onto so you don’t to hit the ground- face reality. You’ve built the ropes – like a spider builds its web. They don’t let you fall; don’t let you hit the ground. What you conveniently fail to notice here is that you’re left hanging. You’re delusional.
There comes a day when you realize that you’re being drawn to the ground; gravity isn’t a force you can defy for long. You stop pretending. You stop denying. You come to terms with whatever haunts you, you cut off all the ropes and you feel. Pain.
And with that you begin your descend to the ground – anticipating hurt yet knowing there it is your only way out. You’re free falling and for the length of a second, you feel free – independent, nothing can break you now. You think maybe the fall is exactly what you need.
It isn’t until you’re an arm’s length away from the ground that the harsh truth hits you. You realize that cutting off all the ropes wasn’t the solution. You realize you’re going to hit the ground and it’s going to hurt. Badly. But maybe, you think, it won’t be that bad- you have so many people who’ll be there to catch you. No? You quickly go through the names in your head and you grasp that there isn’t really anyone who’ll be there always. In the right place, at the right time. You’re alone. The ground is stone cold. You’re in free fall. There isn’t anyone to help you. What do you do? Do you close your eyes and think it will be quick – like ripping off a bandage? Do you scream, yell, run around, desperately looking for help? Do you try to take your mind off? Do you make stupid decisions and hurt yourself even more? No matter what you choose to do – you do fall. And get hurt. You feel the pain. It doesn’t just go away. Some may try to let the worldly affairs take their mind, and possibly even their bodies, away from their own miseries; while the others- they drench themselves in their pain.
With the suffering, you have a choice. You have a say in how you want to go through the phase. But the realization that comes later- it’s inevitable. Like it or not, you’re alone. You can make a zillion friends, you may have the most loving family but there will come a time when you’ll find yourself free falling and the reasons for that won’t really matter. It won’t matter what hurts you, the blame game won’t satiate you anymore. When you come to terms with the pain- you have no choice but to feel it and deal with it. That’s when you’ll be on your own; about to hit rock bottom knowing you’re going to be hurt bad. You won’t try to run away this time- you won’t have the time to. You’ll feel helpless, weak. Before you know it, Bam! You’ll be on the ground- not trying to evade the truth anymore, you’ll be shattered.
But the fifth of a second, right after you pull yourself together? In that moment, you’ll be the strongest person there ever was. You’ll realize what independence truly means. You’ll see how no matter what, you were always the only person who could help you get through. You’ll fall in love with yourself– you’ll see the potential that is there in you- latent; waiting to be unleashed. The patience, the courage- to move mountains and touch the skies. What sucks here is- that moment, nay, that fleeting moment- will pass. And no matter how strong a person you come off, you won’t feel as strong as you did in that one moment; when you fell in love with yourself- when you could fathom your own invincibility and infallibility. You’ve got to hold onto that moment. It will help you move mountains for real. It will help you understand and better breathe in the bitter truth of being alone. And if you’re one of the silver lining seekers- you’ll see just how much of a blessing it is to have had that moment; to have gone through the pain and to have emerged as an individual with courage, patience and peace in his heart.
All I have to say to you is, Happy Realization.
Kritika Vidyarthi is an eighteen-year-old law school aspirant from Bombay. While she’s an out-going and fun-loving person, nothing excites her more than staying at home and learning something new. Writing and reading is her escape from the real world and this post is the first article that she has ever made public.